Expectations

It's all said and done. I had my baby. I am now a mommy.

I love it. It's a million times better than being pregnant. My son is amazing. He's close to three months old, and things are really beginning to get interesting. Not that he wasn't the most interesting thing to happen to me, but now his personality is really starting to shine through. He's a stinker. It's no surprise, my husband and I were both handfuls as children, and are still energetic, so we were expecting a goon eventually. But we still love him. Even through his fussy eating and seemingly endless supply of poop, we can't get enough of him.
I have high expectations for myself as a parent. While I was pregnant I read several parenting, and child psychology books. I also followed fellow mom blogs and collected kid friendly ideas for food, music, games, toys, and just about every other imaginable idea out there. So far, I'm fostering goals to establish independent play and creativity as opposed to TV time, I'm all for homemade baby foods and learning Baby Sign Language, and as much Spanish as I can so Christian's language skills won't suffer.

Maybe it's a bit much. Maybe I'm a bit of a Tiger Mom. As he grows up, he'll be expected to be courteous and polite, well-rounded, and entertaining. I think I have things figured out... but all this will probably backfire. I dream of a well-behaved, smart, attractive little boy who is musically talented, as well as athletic, gets good grades, and is well-liked by his peers. Hopefully I can be a good mommy and achieve such a child. But, Even if I'm as good a mommy as I think I can be, I'll still love whoever Christian turns out to be :)

Things I would love for nursery decor

http://flavorwire.com/197232/minimalist-posters-for-your-favorite-childrens-stories/15#post_body

I just discovered the link option... Kind of lame... haha! But here are some really awesome posters that I would LOOOVE to use as decorations in the nursery once we're in the 2 bedroom apartment. I already have several book covers I made into framed pictures that my mother helped me make (Librarian grandmother!) But these would complete the bookish environment I plan on raising my children in. Plus they look so classy! Not all loud and cluttered like Disney paraphenalia.

Pregnant pictures

http://lifeofhours.blogspot.com/2011/07/kason-and-keisha.html

Above are pictures of me being pregnant, If you care to observe!

Pregnant pictures

A friend of mine asked me to model for her budding photography studio. I was quite flattered and agreed, even though I didn't ever plan on taking pictures of myself pregnant. She did a wonderful job, and here is her link if you care to take a look!

lifeofhours.blogspot.com

Almost done!

I have a month and one day until my wiggly little boy should enter into this world! Hopefully it will be less! I am so excited. I can honestly say I feel more excited to be a mom, and just have my very own baby than I feel about labor. I'm not too nervous for childbirth. It's gotta happen, and it's been happening to women since the beginning of time. It seems a little silly to be nervous, if you ask me.
Concerning baby preparations, my husband and I decided to try and save as much money as possible for the baby. We're staying in out little 1 bedroom apartment until December or so, when our lease is up, then we will move into a bigger 2 bedroom place. During the last few weeks of June, and the very first part of July, I "nested" like crazy. I am thrilled with my efforts. I was able to clear out all the closets of unnecessary junk, and make room for a used washer and dryer! (I now make amends to the washer and dryer god, as it is so nice to own a set and not use the apartment complex's or a laundromat :) I also upgraded a fair amount of our furniture, and only spent a total of $60 on a new couch, dresser, and TV stand. The TV stand looks nice and is super baby proof. The dresser is a little smaller than my old one, but is upright and gives us more space in the bedroom for a cradle. We've also gotten rid of internet, made our netflix account to DVDs by mail only, and gotten rid of Melaleuca. That saves us a fair amount of money each month. Once the baby is born, we're going to downgrade to just 1 phone, and hopefully that will lower our phone bill. Other budget cuts involve me leaving the apartment during the day so we don't have to run the AC and make our electricity bill outrageously high. This is hard because it's been SOOOO hot! I just go hang out at Barnes and Noble, visit friends, or go swimming.
Once the baby is born we'll be using mostly cloth diapers. A friend has convinced me of their cheapness, and I'm quite excited! I think the cloth diapers they have now are really cute, and I think I've figured out a method to stay on top of them and get the most out of them. The washing machine will come in VERY handy during this time!! We really will be saving lots of money, and I'm happy about not doing as much damage to the environment. We've been recycling more, and now I feel horribly guilty when I throw something away that can be recycled :/
Another thing I'm really looking forward to regarding the baby is getting to teach him!! I laugh sometimes, this poor kid has two teachers for parents. A Spanish teacher, and a music teacher (and possibly future English teacher) my children are doomed to hear about the education system, as well as be expected to do their very best, especially in those subjects. Not to mention he has a librarian for a grandmother! I hope I can make it enjoyable for them. I refuse to homeschool. I've met too many weirdo homeschooled kids, and I want socially wise children. Plus, I feel I need the time away from my kids for a bit. I will be very actively involved in their educations and I plan on volunteering as much as I can once they are in school. I believe THAT is the role of the parent in education. The teachers should not do everything.
In regards to educating my child. My husband and I have decided to raise our children in a bilingual home. This was initially my husband's idea (obviously, Spanish teacher!) At first I figured he could just do all the Spanish speaking and I'd do English, but now realizing, I'll probably be the ones my children see most, since I plan on staying at home, I'll need to learn some Spanish! I found a great podcast called Coffee Break Spanish. They go nice and slow and repeat a lot. We're also going to buy lots of Spanish books and I'll be able to read those to him. I'm learning with my baby. I've been doing research on Baby sign language, and we're going to do that too. It enhances language development and helps understanding between languages when used in conjunction in bilingual homes. I'm excited. I want smart babies. Plus, boys tend to develop slower than girls in language and small motor skills. I've seen this, and I am determined to combat it.
A few little rules we've decided to establish in our home.
*Regular established bedtimes and bedtime rituals
*No TV until 2 (but I might see if we can make it to 3)
*No sleepovers until 10
*No PG movies until 5, and after that they still need to ask until age 8
*Homework comes first
*Everyone gets equal amounts of chores!

Some of the rules are maybe a little strict, but I'm not a fan of TV. We will probably never have cable or satellite. there are simply other things I'd rather spend my money on, especially when we will be living on a teacher's salary. And children don't need to spend time in front of the tube. Knowing me and my husband, the kids will probably be just as hyper and energetic as us both! So if they don't get the right amount of activity during the day, the bedtime hours will be a nightmare!!
I'm very very VERY excited to become a mom and meet the squirmy little boy inside my belly right now. He is truly a miraculous creation and a special child of God. I can feel it. I love him already!!

the true flavor of yellow

I generally do not choose to eat lemon flavored candies or desserts. Even some lemonades get swooped into the "inedible" category as deemed by myself. However, yellow sweet tarts are the best flavor among all the sweet tarts. I eat them first before moving to the green, then blue, then purple then red. For some reason sweet tarts got right combination of lemon and sugar to make it purely awesome yellow treat.
I do love good lemonade. I don't think there's any better lemonade than freshly squeezed lemons right off my grandmother's lemon tree. That's some good lemonade. And if you like my version of a lemonade recipe (skimp slightly on the sugar) Then I'm sure you'll agree. I guess I like the yellow sweet tarts best because they taste closest to lemonade. I call this flavor "The True Flavor of Yellow".
It seems there are two ways you can mess up achieving The True Flavor of Yellow. You can add to much sugar, which turns the natural sunny, tangy, zing of lemonade into a sappy, weak blend of nothing special. It's like comparing two little girls, one who is truly smily, happy, honest and bright to the one who sugarcoats all her actions, is not truly happy, and only has an outward display of sweetness. This is what lemon pies, custards, puddings, and bars taste like to me. Fake. Not truly lemon. Lemon is ridiculously sour and pies, cakes and cookies that add all the sugar and frou-frou to a lemon dessert sap that tartness away. It's not sunny, lemony, zing anymore. It's covered up and hidden.
The other way to destroy The True Flavor of Yellow is by somehow chemically morphing it into a cheap, mass produced treat that is more bitter than tangy or sweet! Now I know you're probably thinking "well she's dump, sweet tarts are mass produced, and cheap" Yes, but they taste good, so it's beside the point. Lemon drops, skittles and lemon starbursts all taste slightly bitter to me. They taste like the girl who not only pretends to be sunny and nice, but isn't at all and really says nasty things about people behind their backs.

Thus is my analysis of The True Flavor of Yellow. When the right amounts of sugar and lemon are involved, yellow tastes sunny, bright, happy, tart, energizing, exciting and zingy. Bananas and pineapples evoke other shades of yellow in their right dimensions, but lemon yellow has very definitive properties, that when messed up only portray the wrong ideas, and of course color. To me, eating too sweet lemon tastes more dull gray, and too bitter lemon is just painful highlighter yellow. But lemonade with just the right amount of sugar is the perfect pretty shade of sunny yellow. :)

Happy news!

Oh dear. This blog is becoming more Mormon Mommy... *sigh... But I need to share my happy news first! And I voice another opinion at the same time.

We found out on Friday we'll be having a little boy. I'm very excited. I was hoping for a girl, even thought I felt in the back of my mind it was a boy all along. I have three younger sisters, and I know what to do with a little girl, so a little boy just scared me some. I don't like bugs, I don't understand half of Kason's silly antics, and I was so terrified I'd be a terrible mother to a little boy. Miraculously, I'm not so nervous about a boy any more. I'm still nervous about being a mother, but looking rationally at how I react to kids, I don't think my disciplining is too harsh, but it is firm, and my opinions/judgements do not change. My primary class still likes me even after I tell them to behave, so I think I'll be okay.

We have decided on a name. Kason and I actually have all the names we like picked out. We're boring like that I guess. This little boy will be Christian Andrew. After his two grandpas. My father, and Kason's. Christian is also my grandfather's name, but he goes by Raymond. It's a good, strong name and he'll have 3 wonderful men to look up to and to fill shoes. His initials will also be similar to his father's. I like family names. It's nice to use them when possible. Not all the other names we've picked our family names, but they are still special.
A name is an important thing. I feel this name is pretty solid against any name-bullying that may come about from evil other children. It's not too weird, or old-fashioned, and hopefully his name will hold significance to him, so he'll carry his name with honor. Hopefully this name will keep him a good kid who wants to serve the Lord and lead a righteous life. Because I love this squirmy little booger to let him lead any other kind of life!

On a slightly different topic, people keep telling me to "be prepared" because my "kid's going to be so hyper and crazy" "just like his dad"! Personally, I truly hope he is an energetic, imaginative booger! It's better than some boring bum of a kid, who watches TV all day. I don't care how many doctors we fund expensive cruises, and lavish dinner parties fixing up his broken bones and stitching his scrapes and gashes. We'll have fun doing it. Plus, if this kid is crazy, he gets just as much of it from me too. I may be the one who currently keeps my husband calmer than before, but I was a bouncy, crazy little girl, and I still have copious amounts of energy and spark. Remember, this kid is half mine! I'm a booger too!

My dishes and Grandma

            I eat dinner off of fairly new stoneware I received from my relatives for my wedding. I chose the style of dishes to match my future “dream kitchen”. The dishes have a blue center with a yellow border. In the yellow border are little blue flowers. I remember choosing a more casual dinner sitting as opposed to fine china, because I wanted to have nice dishes to use every day. I also wanted to find a unique and more special pattern for my china. I figured I wouldn’t be using china for several years, or at least until I start hosting my own Thanksgivings. So it could wait to join my budding dishes collection.

            These plates and bowls may seem slightly silly to hold in such high esteem. As a poor, married college student, I probably shouldn’t expect to eat of brand name stoneware, and should be content with eating out of plastic mismatched utensils, just like my husband. I also probably should avoid concerning myself with determining my future “dream kitchen”. Especially since more important things need to be worried over.

            But these dishes are special to me. They hold significance in my life and they connect a number of important factors together. My grandmother on my mother’s side has always been very close to me. I like to flatter myself that we are very much alike, and I inherited her expensive taste and knack to make her home appear sophisticated, yet budget friendly. (The future home in my mind is much closer to this than my current scatter-brained apartment). These wedding dishes begin my own collection and also remind me of older memories with dishes.

            My relatives purchased the dishes for me, namely my grandmother and aunts on my mother’s side. My grandmother organized the contributions to purchase these dishes. She owns several different kinds of dinnerware, and continually collects more. She loves to cook, she is an impeccable housekeeper, and thoroughly enjoys entertaining with her fine china and dishes. She cooks generous meals for those who are friends, family or simply guests. She believes good dishes makes things even more civilized and enjoyable.

My beautiful grandmother, to whom I am her oldest grandchild, bought me my very first tea set. It was off-white with pink roses in the centers. It was real china, with matching candelabras and two little pink fake candlesticks. I received them on Christmas morning when I was about six years old. Previously that year, I got caught admiring my grandma’s first tea set she had as a little girl. It was displayed openly on her hutch. She decided it was high time I have my own tea set to distract me from potentially breaking hers. I saw that first tea set as a way we were now similar. My own dishes collection just began, and one day I hoped to have beautiful dishes just like grandma.

            I cherished that tea set. I was never the girliest of girls growing up, but something in that tea set sparked my inner girly.  I had so much dressing up my dolls and little sister, decorating our little wooden table my grandfather made for us, and throwing a tea party with water and saltine crackers (that was all my mother permitted us eat in our bedroom). If we felt especially mischievous, we would bust out the hidden stashes of Halloween treats and enjoy delicate tarts with the tea. The meals were always fancy. Something about pick roses insist that everything must maintain the highest possible standard of fanciness to a little girl. During the summer time it was essential that our pretty table have a vase with flowers from the garden to sit in between the pink candlesticks.

            It was thrilling to dress up and pretend to become the most polite Lady Sarah and honorable Madame Lucille. We held eloquent conversations in our supposed British accents. We discussed the weather and the poor health of our dolls. We wore the laciest, frilliest dress-ups in the box, and made sure to take turns using the pink clutch that looked like it had diamonds on it. When things got dull we would consider and plot how we could possibly sneak into mom’s makeup. When that seemed fruitless the imaginative roles would alter and the plot shifted to the backyard rope swing, where we inevitably morphed into lost British ladies in the Amazon, who lived in a cave and swung across a huge lake to gather pecans that fell from the generous tree above. Eventually, fairies and unicorns wandered into our storyline, and we would be far from the original tea party by dinnertime, only to remember it right before bed while we picked up our mess.

            I grew up before too long, and by the time my younger sister got her own tea set, I was a little too old for those games. Her tea set had a checkered tablecloth and a cute carrying basket, and she resorted to engaging the next sister in the fantasy world we first created.  Eventually all three of my sisters received their own teas sets before long, and I know all three have made up their own parties with each other and their dollies. Their plots seemed wildly elaborate, but they still clunked in mom’s old heels and argued over the prettier dress-ups, just like me and the oldest of my three sisters.

            Returning to my wedding, and the grown up dishes I now own. I was married in the Albuquerque, New Mexico LDS Temple. I upheld a longtime Mormon tradition, by being married in this sacred building. As the oldest grandchild on my mother’s side, I feel I set a huge example to not only my younger sisters, but all my younger cousins as well.

            Families are important in the Latter-day Saint religion. The events of my wedding spanned a weeklong event where dozens of cousins, aunts, uncles, grandparents, and bosom friends came to celebrate. The closest of these watched us marry in the temple, and many, many others celebrated with us at the two separate receptions held in our honor. One reception took place in Portales, New Mexico in my parent’s backyard at sunset. The second took place in my husband’s hometown, Carlsbad, New Mexico at the local LDS chapel. Both were equally lovely, although I admit I preferred the Portales reception, because my family and friends attended. In Carlsbad, mostly my husbands friends, and family, attended, and most of these attendants I met for the very first time.

            My mother’s fours sisters, my aunts, took charge of the decorating at the first reception. My colors were yellow and light blue with daisies being the main flower. The decorations were a success, even with the ever-persistent prairie wind that fluttered the tablecloths, ladies skirts, and the labored decorations.

Paper lanterns bordered the fence to the garden, daisies were on every table, and homemade blackberry ice cream was served with the cake. The blackberries were even fresh from my family’s garden! The pale colors and daisies highlighted the essential fresh country look I wanted. In fact, in some of the pictures form the reception; you can see my family’s chickens pecking bugs and seeds within the fenced garden.

            My aunts used two displays as part of the decorations. One was a small quilt they made with a picture of the temple in the middle and fabric matching my wedding colors around it. The second display was my dishes. The dishes I chose months before. They matched my wedding colors. I did this on purpose, so I would always have a reminder of that special event.

They set the dishes on the same wooden table, my grandfather made and I used growing up for those first tea parties. I believe they chose that table because it was convenient and the right size, but the two together symbolized a powerful binding of memories. Amidst the hugs, smiles, laughter, and delicious ice cream, I noticed that table under my new dishes, and my smile widened.

            When the sun was an orange, fiery ball along the waves of grass, my reception drew to a close. For the beginning of July, the weather was extremely cooperative and happily allowed us to celebrate in a comfortable temperature. The breeze gusted generously, but merely added a charming flutter to the decorations. The sunset altered the colors of the reception ever so slightly, and my dad lit the floating candles in the goldfish pond, much to the delight of my young cousins. Fewer people arrived, but many still hovered around for hugs and conversation. The ice cream began to melt, and finally I decided to toss the bouquet and signify my reception was beginning to end.

            When the guests remaining were mostly family, my grandmother finally found time to talk to me. She was the one who organized my extended families contributions to purchase my dishes. Even though I chose the dishes and knew exactly what they looked like before tonight, she wanted to make sure I loved them. I walked with her over to the table and picked up the plate.

“I love these, Nanny. Thank you so much!”

“I’m glad you like them. They suit you, and you have good taste! I remember when I bought your first tea set. You were so excited to open it up and play with them that Christmas morning. Do you still have them?”

“ Of course! Well, they’re all packed up in a box, but I have them. Every piece too, I think. And look! My new dishes are sitting on that wooden table Papa made for me a long time ago!”

“ Really? Oh they are. That’s neat. Take care of these new dishes too so your family can eat good food off them even when you are my age. And perhaps you’ll have a daughter someday who can take that tea set out of the box.”

“I hope so. And I hope I make good food! And don’t worry, Nanny, I’ll take very good care of them.”

“I’m proud of you today. I love you.”

“I love you too.”

            My grandmother left me to look at my dishes. Yes, they were just dishes, but they were another special gift from my grandmother. These dishes continued my beginning collection of dishes that would be used to share future food, and family traditions. These dishes connected two memories, and two women. My childhood and my newlywed life, myself and my grandmother bonded over those dishes.

REAL food

There have been countless times where my father has inserted his opinion on the reason my family is all super skinny. And I say super skinny, because we are. I'm not bragging, it's just a fact. One of his ideas is that my mom has always believed in cooking homemade food for us. She cooked wholesome meals within a reasonable budget, and made sure they were always well balanced and nutritious. She never busted bank, and we didn't eat everything organic, they were just good wholesome meals. But most importantly, they were homemade.

Homemade means this:
Hamburger helper.... is not homemade
Kraft macaroni and cheese... is not homemade
Neither is cake, bread, muffins, cookies or brownies from a box

We weren't starved from such things. Making cake from a box is MUCH easier and a lot less fail proof. But it is not homemade. Yeah, you made it at home... but I don't think it deserves the same praise and glory as a cake made from scratch. Especially if you use fake frosting. We would also occasionally eat Mac and cheese if we had a babysitter. But one mom found a really good recipe for Macaroni and cheese, we were all hooked on that.

Now, my father's reasoning I believe lies in the ingredients. Check the ingredients on a package of any store-bought processed meal or snack. Processed foods contain more fat, sugar, and salt. They might not blatanly tell you that, but they do. High fructose corn syrup, sodium, dextrose, anything -ose. Not to mention the unpronouncable "others". Preservatives, colorants, texture enhancers, flavor enhancers... The list goes on!

When my parents first got married, my mom told my dad that she did not make breakfast. If he wanted a big breakfast, he had to make it himself. I grew up on pancakes, literally almost every morning. I would eat 3-4 pancakes before soccer games, swim meets, school, and track. Cereal made rare appearances in our home. When we went to visit grandma she would call beforehand and buy our favorite cereals for us to eat during our stay. We would happily binge on Cocoa Pebbles for a few days, but always happily return to eating daddy's pancakes. He makes the best!!

So. We ate well. We had large breakfasts every morning, and wholesome, preservative, Red #40, and carageenan free meals. And all of my siblings and my parents have healthy weights, low blood pressure, and regular digestive systems.

I plan on cooking this way for my children. If I can afford it, I'll add some organic fruits and vegetables to the mix (I've been sold on organic apples. They actually have flavor, and appropriate skin thickness! That's really the only reason) I'd want a big garden and fruits trees around my yard. And someday I'll learn how to can!

I think mom cooked this way because it was cheaper. Making homemade meals is not always convenient, but I believe the long term benefits were far more convenient than anything else. :) Plus, the results taste SO MUCH BETTER!!

I'm off to enjoy a meal I just made of homemade chili, cinnamon rolls and a rare trat of fresh squeezed lemonade from my grandparents lemon tree!

maybe exciting news will instigate more followers...

So I decided to share some exciting news on my blog! Mainly because I'm pretty sure no one read it, and we're to the point of sharing with everyone anyway.

I'M GONNA HAVE A BABY!!

That's right! in September, our life is going to be blessed with a mini-one-or-the-other, making this an official Mormon Mommy Blog. I like to think it's not THAT official yet, since I don't really become a mom until the baby is born... so I guess it's a Mormon Mommy in Training Blog. whee.

Another reason I wanted to blab the good news, is because I've been having some wacky dreams. So wacky and realistic, I made sure to double check at my ultrasound that there was only ONE baby in there and not three... The latest baby-related dream was very funny... and also ominous, because I'm sure this is bound to happen with my luck.

In my dream I had a bouncing baby boy. He appeared to be about 7 months old and I was changing his diaper in the dream. This particular diaper had not held the released contents of my son's bowels effectively. There was poop all over the boy. While changing his diaper he managed to kick his little feet free and stick them into his poop. Eventually, I managed to wipe up most of the mess and left him on my bed while I went to run a bath for him. I left him lying on the bed un-diapered (he was going straight to the bath) and returned in time to observe the conclusion of his urination. So now pee was all over him AND my bed! I was obviously upset in my dream at now having to find time to wash my bed linens. I stuck my baby boy in the tub and proceeded to wash him. While he happily splashed in the bath, I forgave him a little. He looked super cute! And then he pooped. Again. In the tub.

Now. If you do happen to read my blog. Don't be stupid and comment on my facebook wall. If you must, message me, or comment on the blog. I haven't made the "Facebook Announcement" I'm waiting until the end of February for that. And I'm not going to put an ultrasound picture up. It's my uterus, and in experience looking at someone else's "baby" or so they say, is always confusing. It was super exciting to see our baby, and got those pictures, but I don't wish to force a view of my uterus on all my facebook friends. And I doubt I'll post a picture of me and my belly. It's all exciting, and I can't wait to show, but I think the only way you get to see my big belly is if you have the priveledge of seeing me in person. Those are just my opinions. I don't condone others who put those pictures up. I understand all the excitement! Its just not for me. :)